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Astronomology with....... Mavis Masterful Psychic of the Psychic
Babbling Network * Email: MavisDavisPBN@funnycoke.com |
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Astronomology
A ries (21 March - 19 April)
A good day to do something you've never done before. Before the sun sets, a strange transformation will take place before your eyes. Something red will cross your path. You won't think much of it until you realize it is a black cat with severe sunburn.
Taurus (20 April - 20 May)
After much bull-headedness, it is time to take a valium and calm down before you have an emotional breakdown. Clean your ears well after your morning shower so you will be able to hear what is said about you this week. It's time to put that troll doll collection into retirement and make room for the "Raindrop Collection."
Gemini (21 May - 21 June)
This week will be a time of constant consternation as you continually check your checkbook but find it still won't balance correctly. If you have a notion to make some major purchases this week, check the consumer guide to see if what you want to buy is an actual product.
Cancer (22 June - 22 July)
Once again you are being stalked by the cranky cross-dressing crab from the local army/navy store. GI Joe has nothing on this guy as he goes on maneuvers. You will be best served by staying out of the limelight and setting your sights a little lower this week. A surprise is headed your way so be prepared.
Leo (23 July- 22 August)
Now is the time to re-visit some of the new year's resolutions of the past. You know which ones I mean. Don't be argumentative this week - let your fists do your talking. Beware of falling glass, as it could be a real pain for you. Avoid any restaurant that hasn't been in business for at least 5 years. Check for dust bunnies under your bed.
Virgo (23 August - 22 September)
This could be a stressful week as a power struggle will emerge and you will be one of the combatants. You've been keeping quite a bit bottled up and are due for a power surge. Let sleeping dogs lie unless you want to risk a tetanus shot. Don't step on a crack or you might twist your ankle and fall.
Libra (23 September - 23 October
If you think your life is spinning out of control, you've probably been staring at a front loading washing machine at the Laundromat again. It is time for a little fluff and fold but watch the starch. If your psychiatrist prescribes a happy meal as a way to turn that frown upside down, get a second opinion from Mayor McCheese.
Scorpio (24 October - 21 November)
Leave nothing to chance this week as you could become the victim of a makeover gone badly on a local talk show. Sign up for a charitable cause and the rewards will be yours for the taking, especially if you don't turn in that donation container. Be careful with the toenail clipper or one of those little piggies will never go to market again.
Sagittarius (22 November - 21 December)
This is a tremendous week for starting a new project, just don't let the sales associate at Home Depot load the supplies in your car. Always remember and never forget to always remember and never forget. For every burned out light on Broadway there is an electrician looking for a new bulb. Don't be one of those bulbs.
Aquarius (20 January - 18 February)
If you ever wanted to be self-employed, a serious look at the Hare Chrishners is in order. No experience is necessary but owning a tambourine is a plus. Be careful of drive thru's - they may hold many mysteries that can't be explained nor redeemed with a half price coupon.
Pices (19 February - 20 March)
If you are a risk taker, then this is a good week to hide under the bed. If you don't hear the doorbell ring then there is probably no one at the door. Have lunch delivered to your house this week and give yourself a well-deserved treat. Call a friend you haven't talked to for while.
Check back every week for your Astronomical
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All work the property of Mavis